shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
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