Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
