there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
