If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Randomize
