Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
