I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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