U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
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