I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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