Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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