Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
