I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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