let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
