But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
