Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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