I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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