god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
