i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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