were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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