Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
