There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
