Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Swine flu is the new snow day.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
