Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize
