The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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