Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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