Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
