DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
