We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
