I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
