walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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