You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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