I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
