But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
