when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
