Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
