Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
