where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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