I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
So squirting runs in the family.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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