Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
