I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
