Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Randomize
