Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
