Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
