Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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