I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Randomize
