And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
