Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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