It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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