I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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