Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(510): View more from California

one might say we're banned from that church

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

From behind she looks like Richard Simmons

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(217): View more from Illinois

he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper

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(901): View more from Tennessee

Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.

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(314): View more from Missouri

hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?

(636): View more from Missouri

Yup.

(314): View more from Missouri

Yup.

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(912): View more from Georgia

I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.

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(248): View more from Michigan

You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.

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(727): View more from Florida

Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila

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(479): View more from Arkansas

These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.

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