THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
